Bitchin' About - Truck Nuts

Truck Nuts.

They are (fake) testicles you hang from your truck. For reasons unknown.

They come in metallic.

They come in neon.

Some look like steel.

And others declare not only your love for genitalia but for the US of A.



I hate truck nuts. I'm not prude; I just don't understand the concept.


Are you trying to tell me that your truck is a penis? Wouldn't the testicles need to be bigger to be anatomically correct?

Is the truck a metaphor for your penis? Like, you have a huge, metal, fast-riding penis?

If it is supposed to be penis...why are you driving one? Why can't you just be happy driving a truck?

I'm all for decorating your car as you see fit. There are tons of bumper stickers, window decals and personalized license plates. Those items I understand. You're telling the world a little bit about yourself. Like you're the mother of an honor student.

Or that you have tons of children.

But truck nuts? Truck nuts?

Actually that last one is pretty clever.